1/28/10

A message from a writer

I sometimes find myself at a loss for words when I try to explain why I decided to separate myself from the movement, this illegitimate religion called Unificationism. I had an awakening, an epiphany, something beyond words, but I will try my hand at a testimony if it means I might help someone out.

My family was never very religious, so everything I learned about the church I learned from Sunday school and workshops. I learned about how selfless and perfect Rev. Moon was (the title “True Father” seems like such a fraud now…) and how we as a movement were so special because we knew the messiah was here, and we had great visions for world peace. That was all I ever knew because that was all I ever heard. “We are the future, we are humanity’s greatest hope.” Then, somewhere along my personal journey for truth and understanding, I began to peel back the superficial layers and all the ugliness flooded out. The abuse of money (“We affirm…that public resources are solely for public purpose.” Yeah, right.). Rev. Moon’s other life, his other wives, his hateful words, his contradictions.

The truth was ugly but undeniable, and all I had to do to find it was open my eyes. It’s been there all along, buried beneath Lovin’ Life and the flashy show church leaders put on to make Unificationism seem like some trendy belief, like “the thing.” So hip, so cool, so empty, so meaningless.

I found the truth and my life was in turmoil. It still is, when I find myself confined to the matching and Blessing process despite my loss of faith. I still struggle. I still lose sleep at night sometimes. But I stand by my beliefs. I refuse to be brainwashed again. I refuse to close my eyes.

I am so grateful to have parents who accept me for who I am and have given me the freedom to believe in whatever I think is right. I feel at peace knowing that there is a greater Truth out there and that I am free. Despite my being put through the matching/Blessing ordeal, I am free.

My name is Cristina, I am 16 from the Los Angeles area, and I do not support Unificationism. I am a nonbeliever.

I will not be ashamed of my beliefs, or my disbelief for that matter. Whatever you do, I’m with this blog 100%.